Sixth stop: Austin, TX. Contact: Lee. Duration: 5 nights, 4 Days. Goal: To see a city neither Halearious nor I has ever seen and to hang out with Lee (the man).
The ride out of New Orleans west on the 10 was built straight over the Louisiana swampland, the Louisiana bayou. A nice drive where the speed limit hits 70+ MPH and there isn't much of a reason to stop other than to get more gas.
We had a small detour planned before we reached Austin. It was to see Grandpa Jack, father to our step mom, Anne. Grandpa Jack is a classic individual and took us out to one of his favorite local joints called Hungry's. An apt title considering the number of times I've heard Halearious say, "I'm hungee." It was a solid joint with low prices and good food. When I first saw how inexpensive everything was I set the bar low. After we ate, I realized I had gotten out of NYC just in the nick of time. Good food does not have to cost a lot of money. NYC has warped my price sensitivity and expectations when going to eat. I am only too delighted to get back into the world of good food cheap.
We spent ~3 hours straight chilling with Grandpa Jack before we rolled onwards to Austin. As we left Houston, Halearious turns to me and says, "I love him!" “Duh,” I think.
The drive to Austin was pretty quick 3 hours - that is - until the last 20 minutes, which took forever. Maybe it was excitement to see an old friend, or maybe it was just a long day in the car. When we did arrive in Austin, and found our friend, Lee's apartment, we did what two excited Mahoney's do; we knocked on the door and ran around the corner giggling. Halearious lasted about 2 seconds before she popped her head around and said hello. Lee was there with his head poked out the door. We both gave Lee a big hug, and then Lee suggested a group hug. There it was - Mansfield, Austin style. For the next 5 nights, it was the three of us doing everything together - even when one of the three of us may not have wanted to. What was good for two of us was good for the group - and in many cases, what was good for one of us was good for the group.
Since we arrove (a word Lee once thought was real) late at night, we just chilled in Lee's apartment. A sweet pad with a lot of space to hang out and relax. Lee lives by himself. A recent replant from the east coast - Lee is still settling in - and it was our hope we could assist with this in the short time we were there. But, for the first night, Lee helped us settle in with a cold six pack of Honey Brown and an assortment of Sam Adam's chilling in the fridge. A nice way to settle in with old friends in a new city.
Unfortunately, Lee had to work the next day so Halearious and I had to go explore Austin on our own while posting things on Facebook that would make Lee jealous. It was tough work, but there aren't two better jackasses out there to do the work. Halearious and I went for it. We cruised down to University of Texas - Austin to see what all the hype was about.
We first stumbled upon the athletic complex. Ridiculous. They don't have anything like that at Brown and they don't have anything like it at UMass either. What a site. The football stadium might have well been a pro stadium. A massive structure that would have made the Roman gladiators question why they didn't just play college football at UT Austin. Hell, even I was questioning that (bad knees aside).
We stumbled around the campus acting like we were students until hunger started to call us. Then it was off to Texadelphia for some cheese steaks on the recommendation of a good friend and UT alum, Shehan. Neither of us really wanted a cheese steak, but when in Austin (or Texas) do as the Texans do - eat beef and lots of it - it's what's for dinner; it's what's for lunch; and you can eat if for breakfast too. When all was said and done, I'm sure we all had eaten a cow a piece.
After lunch, it was time to do some more pedestrian exploring. I had eaten way too much not to walk it off. We continued along the campus aimlessly, while I snapped shots and Halearious did silly poses. I wondered where all the pretty girls where, but then realized that it was probably cheerleading practice. It was 3PM and it was time to go home.
We did laundry and we waited for Lee.
To our delight, he came home at 5:30PM and was even given Friday off.
Son, it was time to get our party on.
We all got dolled up and rolled out to the bright lights.
It was time to do BBQ Texas style and Lee had just the right place - Stubbs. A solid locale with a nice selection of Texas BBQ and beer. Drinking-wise, I went with the "Lone Star," which Lee aptly warned was the Texas-grown equivalent to Bud Light. He was dead on. I just wanted to see what Texas was so proud of. I don't think it's "Lone Star."
We all got some assortment of brisket, ribs, sausage, pulled pork, mac & cheese and some other sides, and sharing between us was welcomed. Halearious was drinking the BBQ sauce as if it was alcohol. Things were good.
Stubbs also doubles as a live music venue with a downstairs section dedicated to music. We didn't stick around for the music. We had better things to do: 6th St.
Lee took us to one of his favorite haunts, the Jackalope. A cool bar with a cool gothic vibe - maybe it was the red lights or the waitress dressed like a scantily clad 18th century vampire, but I was digging this place. Lee was onto the Jack and Coke trail I once knew and loved; Halearious and I went with Vodka & sodas (we're watching our respective figures). Per usual, I caused a hassle for the employees, but got the Celtics and Lakers game on. We were at the Jackalope for a few hours and then all of a sudden a crowd arrove. It was largely male and I'd say 90% of them had backpack's on, and we had no reason why. Are backpacks the new thing at bars, or do classes just go really late at UT? No time to debate. We skedaddled.
We strolled around 6th St. with our ears and eyes wide open. Listening. Looking. Where was our next stop? Nothing really grabbed us. We swung into a dueling piano bar, but did not last more than two minutes. We were gone.
After a few more minutes of walking, we were heading to Lavaca Bar on Lavaca St. A bar Lee had frequented once or twice before. It's quiet as we head in. No worries. Our buzz was wearing off - at the very least, it would be a good pit stop. I got the Celtics and Lakers game on again and we were good to go for a bit.
Then, all of a sudden, magic happened. As we were ordering some Jager bombs, Halearious's eyes lit up and she yelled, "Hoop fever!?!" and was off around the corner.
"What?" I wondered as Lee followed her into the back room. I was left with my Jager bomb, and I was happy. They came back to inform me that there was, in fact a basketball game there, and other games as well. I told them I'd meet them in there. I had some basketball to watch. The Celtics needed my help in beating the Lakers. I couldn't just leave them.
That was, of course, until they came back to get a $20 bill changed into ones. My attention was caught, and as luck would have it, they had televisions in the back room as well.
Hoop Fever it turns out is the basketball game we've all seen before at carnivals and places where one would play games - a lower hoop, closer, and a smaller ball, a 45 second time limit, and a lot of fun. Halearious was looking good. She had done this before - in college, in fact, while working as a waitress. Lee and I were looking a little less good as we admired our follow-through. You see, Hoop Fever is a game of rapid-fire target practice. It is not basketball. Once I figured this out - or remembered this I should say - Halearious and I were duking it out for supremacy. She got out to the lead first with a 58. It did not take long for me to top this with a 59. Shorter still, Halearious came back with a 60 and a ridiculous head down, shoulder shaking, feet stomping dance (she refers to this as her "jig"). Lee and I turned and watched the game as if she was on her own. Others at the bar, however, noticed this dance.
When we ran out of money, I went to the bar to get another $20 changed. When I came back there was a guy and a girl stepping up to Hoop Fever. We all got acquainted quickly, and it turned out the girl with the sweet ass also had played basketball in college. This should be interersting, I thought. I was right. With a few pointers from yours truly, she was off running, or more appropriately, off shooting like a mad man. After a few tries, she shattered my and Halearious's best, and almost beat the recorded best of 76. She officially got a 75. She was done. And shortly after that, so were Halearious and I. We settled into our drinks and watching the end of the Celtics game.
In the meantime, Lee had sauntered off to the ping-pong table for a drunken game of ping-pong. When he came back he vowed never to play ping-pong drunk again.
Our defeats in competition did nothing to defeat our drinking efforts. In fact, it may have aided to them. Because as we walked out of Lavaca St. bar we were all feeling it. And as we walked down 6th St., I suggested we check out "Friends." A bar with a crowd and some live music.
We hung out at Friends until it closed watching a Guns & Roses tribute band and drinking more alcohol.
When the lights came on, we knew it was time to call it a night. It was back to Lee's for some shuteye and who knows what on Friday.
We were joined by a surprise guest on Friday - Mr. Hangover. I guess we had all tied one on too tight on Thursday. Hoop Fever turned into Hangover Fever. It was someplace we had all been before, but no place we were too eager to find ourselves again. We moved slowly for sure. Finally rallying to breakfast at 1PM.
Lee took us to a nice local eatery, Magnolia's. I fell in love with a waitress while I drank my coffee and ate my "vegetarian" omelet. Halearious and I shockingly got the same thing. Lee was a man who marched to his own drum and ordered some shenanigan covered in queso. It was like the poor man's eggs benedict and was pretty damn good. Hell, all the food was good. I'd recommend Mangnolia's to anyone in Texas.
Somehow, and don't ask me how, we ended up at the Salvation Army after breakfast. Damn I didn't want to be there, but luckily Lee noticed a naked female mannequin torso and jokingly asked where he could find a mannequin slicer and my mood changed quickly. Humor is a great remedy for all sorts of pain.
This Salvation Army was nuts. It was like a real store - huge, organized and overpriced. We bounced without any retail goods, but with a new found need for a mannequin slicer.
Thankfully we made a much needed "shit stop" at Lee's apartment after the Salvation.
At some point, it was decided we were going to see "Shutter Island." At a later point, I tried to weasel my way out and stay home on the coach and watch SportsCenter while I nursed my hangover. Lee and Halearious would have none of it. Halearious said she wouldn't go and Lee sat down against the wall and said he wouldn't either. Man, they were packing my bags up real nice for this guilt trip. Three minutes later we were all in the car heading to see "Shutter Island."
We all enjoyed "Shutter Island" to varying degrees. If you want to go see it, you should.
There had been all this big talk that we were going to the Salt Lick for dinner. The Salt Lick is a very famous BBQ restaurant outside of Austin in a small town called Driftwood that closes at 9PM. It didn't happen. We were still moving too slow.
It turned out to be a great turn of events as Lee offered, or Halearious suggested, I can't quite remember, that he would cook us dinner. The menu shaped up as such: Vegetable (mushroom, carrots, asparagus) risotto, salad, and red and white wine. Lee, in the mold of his father, is a very nice cook, and dinner was awesome. It turned out to be the frist home cooked meal we had eaten since we had hit the road way back when. Nothing like a home cooked meal. For sure. Perfect.
After dinner, we chilled, watched most of "Braveheart" and some of the Celtics game.
Sobriety tasted sweet this Friday night.
On Saturday morning, we awoke to grey skies. Not too surprising since Mother Nature has been a prude with her nice southern weather on this trip, but it's ok because we were not going to let it stop us from having fun.
Per usual, our day was based around food.
Breakfast was a smorgus board of Odwalla shakes, shortly followed by an amazing Thai spicy pork and shrimp soup from Crave, a Thai restaurant in downtown Austin that borders on UT's campus. A solid find by Lee. We were all in love with it. Something so great about an Asian soup cooked to perfection. I followed mine up with a Thai iced coffee - a drink so good in fact, that when Lee tasted it he ordered one very quickly.
The one downside of the Thai restaurant was the size of the soup. As a stuggling musician, I should be reticent to complain about good portion sizes for small money, but you see we had early dinner plans. This could hurt.
We were suppossed to meet up with some of the Mayes' clan (stepmom's family) at the Salt Lick at 4:30PM. We were all doomed.
We did our best to walk it off, shit it out, make "I'm hungry" jokes, and stall as long as possible. But too soon for anyone's comfort, the hour to leave was upon us. We picked up a six-pack for the restaurant, which is BYOB, and left for Driftwood. Lee did his best to buy us some time by getting us lost, and this helped a little bit, but there was nothing we could do. The Salt Lick was on the horizon and we were going to eat some more slow cooked meat whether we were hungry or not.
Thankfully, good company took the place of our appetites and we sat around the Salt Lick patio getting acquainted and talking about Texas and everything in between. Lisa, my stepmom's sister, is as nice it gets, and when she heard Halearious was coming down with a cold, took Halearious under her wing, even giving Halearious her warm jacket so that Halearious would stop shivering. Chris, my stepmom's brother, is a great guy, amazing artiist, and outdoors enthusiast who has spent many years in both Texas and California. A great resource for things to do in either location. It was really fun talking to both of them and watching Halearious and Lee get to know Lisa and Chris better.
As we departed Salt Lick, we looked back with even fuller bellies and happy that we had toughed it out and showed up when we did.
We just need to make another shit stop and we'd be fine.
For our last night in Austin, we were perplexed as what to do. I was torn between being responsible (long car ride ahead) and blowing the fucking lid off this place. I knew, either way, I wanted to see live music. Halearious was down to hang out, but was slowly succombing to a cold. Lee was down for almost anything.
Our first (and turned out to be our only) stop was Trudy's, a local Mexican restaurant. Once again, a joint recommended by my friend, Shehan (the UT alumnus). It was Mexican martini's and fun conversation. As the martini's distorted our equilibrium, we played the game "Fuck, Marry, Kill." I feel like I know Halearious and Lee both a lot better after playing this game. I hope they feel the same way about me.
Our night ended at around 2AM with Nightquil pills and some music from Lee's computer.
To say that the above paragraphs 100% sum up our Austin experience, would be inaccurate.
Nuts. Nuts was a cat that Halearious fell in love with. A healthy looking orange, male tabby cat with the largest nuts I've ever seen on a cat. Halearious, the cat whisper, effortlessly had him walking around Lee's apartment even despite Lee's allergies, and we were all in love. We had a new friend. It didn't take much effort for me to name him Nuts, and for us all to agree that it was impossible for him to be called anything else. I think we met him on our second or third day there, and then any other time we were at the apartment, Halearious was in constant search for her Nuts. There is a still a chance Lee is snuggling with Nuts as he ingests Claritin at this very moment.
"Oh, Smallz." Vegas had earlier predicted an over / under of 228 times for "Oh, Smallz" being said. Vegas didn't know Lee was going to love this saying and find it hysterical. Nor did Vegas ever foresee Smallz having a vital role in "Fuck, Marry, Kill." "Oh, Smallz" took on a whole new meaning.
Flav-or-Flav! Yeah boi!
Peace and Love,
Groundswell
PS - I think we got Lee to learn the drums. Watch out!
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